


[SKIP]

by dundee998



Category: Marble Hornets
Genre: Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, One-Sided Attraction, Vomiting, a lad regrets the burger, the lads go out for burgers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-09
Updated: 2020-10-09
Packaged: 2021-03-07 16:35:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,135
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26920735
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dundee998/pseuds/dundee998
Summary: fragments of tape lost from the seven months.
Relationships: Alex Kralie & Jay Merrick
Kudos: 12





	[SKIP]

“What the hell is all this?” Alex kicks a Starbucks cup that’s fallen out of Jay’s car. “Have you never heard of a dumpster?

Jay stands to one side, a deep sinking sensation in his chest. He wishes he could crawl in a hole. “It’s. I’ve. I have bigger things to worry about. It’s not that big a deal.”

“Yeah, sure,” Alex says, and kicks at Jay’s car. Three more cups come bouncing out. “Jesus Christ, do you drink anything other than coffee?” Jay’s fingers tremble. He clutches at his arms, and tries to ignore how weak his wrists feel. “Do you even eat?”

Neither of them speak for a moment. Then Alex kicks the car again. “God DAMMIT. Fuck. That’s it, get in.”

“W-wha–“

“In the car, now.”

“But where are we going?” Jay says as he scrambles into the passenger seat, handing the keys to Alex on automatic.

“We’re gonna get you some food that isn’t going to slowly kill you.”

Jay considers telling him that he’s not hungry, that the nausea in his body has pretty much destroyed what appetite he used to have, when Alex pulls out of the parking space with a wrenching jolt. The words get caught in his throat, and as he looks at Alex’s pinched brow and pained grimace, he decides against it. Maybe he’ll be able to choke something down, if Alex is that determined to see him do it.

———

The first bite of Wendy’s cheeseburger is about as appetizing as a piece of paper, but by the third bite it gets a little easier. Jay doesn’t manage to finish the whole thing, but he’s content to nibble on fries as Alex works on a gas station map – highlighter in one hand, double cheeseburger in the other, and he has to pause every now and then to wipe a drop of special sauce off Route 44.

Alex, for his part, seems ravenous. Jay wonders how long it’s been since he had a real meal too. So far, Alex has been letting Jay take care of expenses. That is, Jay doesn’t ask before paying, and Alex doesn’t react. It just happens.

Sort of like how they ended up working together. Alex plowed ahead, and Jay followed. It had been a pretty smooth transition, even if it was frustrating at times. Then Alex’s car broke down and they had to leave it behind, and suddenly instead of Jay full of unasked questions, it’s Alex demanding answers. It makes Jay feel weird. It’s humiliating to have his weaknesses on display like this, but…

Alex wipes his salty fingers on a napkin, slurps loudly at his soda, then taps his finger on the map. Jay jumps slightly. Shit, he’s zoning out. He feels warm and full and dozy, and these are things he can’t afford right now.

“Amy’s parents live here, but forget them, Amy hated them, she wouldn’t have gone back there. However, her cousin’s in the area too, they went to school together, so we’re gonna go check out the area. Pay a visit to the cousin, research any local legends, look for places that look suspicious. Got it?”

Jay blinks slowly, then nods. It’s getting harder to make out Alex’s voice among the chatter of the restaurant; been a long time since he’s been around other people, but he’s too relaxed to feel the usual tension he gets around crowds.

“Jay. Hey, Jay, look at me.” Alex snaps his fingers in front of Jay’s eyes, and Jay winces a beat late. “Shit. I can’t do anything with you like this.”

There’s a blur, as somehow they move from the brightly lit restaurant to the stark parking lot, and then into Jay’s sour-smelling car. Jay leans his head against the passenger window, the streetlights blurry stars in his eyes as Alex pulls away. Then he closes his eyes.

———

“Get up.”

Jay groans and curls tighter in the bedsheets. Starchy. Motel. When did they get in the motel? “Not telling you again, Jay, get up. We’re leaving in fifteen.” Jay opens his eyes slowly, squinting against the light escaping the blinds. Alex is in the bathroom, speaking over running water. There’s a splash, and then Alex comes around the corner pressing a towel to his face.

He’s shaved, Jay thinks. He looks younger. There’s a bit he missed, under his left jaw, and it makes him look young and unguarded – “Earth to Jay,” Alex snaps. “You have ten minutes to get ready.”

Finally, Jay sits upright and begins the process of getting out of bed. It’s weird. He feels a lot warmer than he’s used to, in the middle of all these thin motel sheets. Alex is sitting on the desk chair, frowning at the map again. His face is still pink from shaving. Jay feels his own face go hot with a dark shadowy self-indulgent thought, and goes to freshen up in the bathroom.

———

Twelve minutes later, they leave the motel room. Jay turns to the parking lot, though he’s not quite sure where Alex parked the car, but Alex shakes his head and tugs at Jay’s sleeve, and Jay learns they’re going to have a ‘continental breakfast’.

“One burger a week isn’t going to keep you on your toes,” Alex explains over a thickly buttered english muffin. “No wonder you kept passing out.”

Jay takes a small bite of blueberry bagel and feels the nausea rising again. He wishes this place’s coffee wasn’t decaf. He wishes he could enjoy food. He wishes Alex would shut the hell up.

Alex glares at him until he finishes at least one of the bagel slices, and then they’re on the road again.

Jay closes his eyes.

[SKIP]

hot sour bile in strings, blueberry and burger and black slime on the ground and Alex is yelling something, Alex is dumping lukewarm water on his face and it’s mixing with the bile and going up his nose, and there’s another wave that throbs his throat and constricts his stomach and

[SKIP]

Alex must have gone over Jay’s car with a trash bag at one point. Jay’s laid out in the backseat, a couple of stolen motel towels over the stinking upholstery and a clean empty ice cream tub by his side. He blinks at the car ceiling; it’s not a perspective he sees often. There’s a ragged scrape there he can’t remember making.

Alex is in the front seat, but the keys are out of the ignition. He’s leaning against the window, and from the slow breaths, Jay thinks he’s sleeping. The sun is still high and hot; one window is cracked to let in a small cool breeze. There isn’t a camera in sight.

He feels

safe

which is something Jay hasn’t associated with Alex Kralie in a very long time.


End file.
